I have gained weight despite the amount of walking I was doing at work.  When we moved, I knew that I would be really busy so I put a freeze on my gym membership so I wouldn’t be totally wasting the money for the monthly fee if I wasn’t going.  Nevermind the few months before that that I went only a handful of times a month!

Well, we are settled into the house, the work thing is almost done and I am so ready to get back to the gym on a regular basis!  I have actually missed going and doing the fun classes or running on the treadmill. 

 I am confident I can get back to being myself again and losing the 10 lbs. that I have gained in the last year.  I feel terrible and frumpy.  I need to get back to myself, I deserve it and I will do it.

I just looked at the class schedules and I look forward to the days and times that I will be going.  I am probably going to do more morning workouts so that I can have the rest of the day ahead of me knowing I had worked hard.  That way, I won’t totally ruin the workout by eating unhealthy. 

I will probably also start back up with the Sisterhood challenges.  I enjoy them and feel so much more accomplished when I can share my excitement with that group of ladies.  They just started a challenge so I will catch them on the next one.

My goals?  Yes, I have them already. 

*Lose ten pounds

*Run more

*Tone up everything that has gone flabby…..yuck!

*Be a hot mama!

I have to say that you are in for hearing about my gym days, just a warning!  It could get really boring!

When I joined the gym over a year ago, I would get on the treadmill and walk and jog and try to increase my jogging time with each workout.  I started out jogging for like 30 seconds or something like that.  The last time I did this, I jogged for 20 minutes and I was elated. 

Then, I stopped with the treadmill and did more classes and weight training.  I got away from the jogging.

Until last week.  I went to the gym and thought that I would get on the treadmill and walk and maybe jog for as long as I could.  I jogged for a mile and a half!  Holy guacamole…that was amazing to me.  I was so excited.  For me, that is a really great thing. I’m not sure if I’ve ever run that far, even with running for 20 minutes last year. 

Today, I decided to push myself to run for 30 minutes.  I did it and logged 2.15 miles and burned 210 calories! 

I have joined challenges with the Sisterhood before and I got away from that as well. I just joined the current challenge, with May being running month. 

My weight is holding steady at 132lbs.  I am happy about this and quite surprised by it at the same time since I haven’t been going to the gym on a steady basis…only about once a week.  I am hoping to increase that to 2-3 days a week. 

Luckily, I do walk a lot at work and we are getting busier so there is more walking.

I have been having some issues recently with my body and it really sucks!  I have been having bad pains in my lower back and abdomin.  I actually feel like I am in labor on a regular basis.  I went to my OB/GYN thinking that maybe I am having some problems with my Mirena IUD but everything is normal and nothing feels out of whack.  She told me to call back in a few days/weeks if I am still in pain and I may have to get a sonogram done to see if I have cysts on my ovaries but she said that they felt normal to her.  So, every single day I am in pain and sometimes at work, I have to crouch down and curve my back for some relief.  I am hoping that it either stops soon or we find out what is causing it so that it will go the heck away!

The work situation hasn’t gotten much better but I routinely remind myself that so many others have it worse than I do.  I am lucky to have a full time job that pays okay (still waiting on that raise that was promised to me months ago!) and isn’t too tough. I am lucky….that is my mantra on those not-so-easy days. 

The housing situation is up in the air.  There isn’t much around here for rent but I did find one house that is sounding perfect…… it is in our school district and area that we love, has 3 bedrooms (ideally we would have 4 but 3 is okay), 2 bathrooms, sits on 2 acres of land, fenced in yard with a play area with swings, a garage, etc.  I responded to the ad and talked to the owner today.  She is in the process of clearing, packing and moving out of the house so she isn’t quite ready to show the house just yet.  She said she is going to call me in a few days to set up a time to show it to us.  I am keeping my fingers crossed and hoping for the best while preparing to be disappointed.  I have been down this road before so I always prepare for the worst.  She said she received so many emails about the house that she has been overwhelmed.  I am really hoping this works out for us.  Keep your fingers crossed too!

Chuck will be going back to work before we know it and it saddens me.  We haven’t been able to spend as much time together as I had hoped.  As some of you know, I cry every single stinking year when he goes back to work.  Maybe this year will be different since I am working and am not used to spending all day together but I am bummed he is going back.  That just means less time together than we have now, which isn’t a lot at all.:(   However, on the bright side, it means more money coming in so we will be in a better situation!

I just keep reminding myself that the warmer, sunnier days are ahead which means, better moods for everyone, more time to spend outside and swimming!

In high school, I had a huge problem with this.  I had low self esteem but I was still happy and outgoing.  I really hated myself inside most of the time though.  I had many people tell me how beautiful and smart I was but I just couldn’t see what they were talking about. 

As I got older, my self esteem rose a bit and now I can say that I have a healthy level of self esteem.  I still have people regularly tell me how wonderful of a person I am and how I don’t even know how beautiful I am but again, it is harder to see that from where I am!

I got my hair cut two weeks ago and I love it.  I have really kept up with the styling everyday and that surprises even myself.  I am a ponytail kind of a girl so for me to put the extra effort of blow drying, flat ironing and spraying my hair on a daily basis….it’s amazing!

I think a huge part of my keeping up with the styling is that I have gotten so many compliments on my hair.  I work in a large building with over 1800 employees and I have had well over 200 people tell me that my hair cut looks great and I look really nice with it.  It has given me a big boost in the self esteem department. 

I have been working out more too so I am losing some weight and hopefully toning up my body in the process.  I have goals for how I want to look but in the meantime, I think I look pretty good…that is a good thing. 

Not the best picture but that's okay!

How is  your self esteem?  It’s okay to feel down some days and that you are looking less than stellar but please believe that you are beautiful inside and out.  We all are, in our own ways.  Our uniqueness is what makes us all beautiful.

I’ve had a lot of ups and downs while on my weight loss journey but I am so very proud to say that I’ve had more downs than ups…weightwise.  I am still very much enjoying working out and toning up.  I’ve taken a lot of classes at the gym and have only found one or two that I didn’t care for. 

I enjoy jogging, lifting weight, pilates, yoga, power yoga, Zumba and spinning.  One of the things that really boosted my weight loss and love of the gym was going with my husband to work out.  He is such a great motivator and trainer.  I loved having him by my side, giving me tips and pushing me to do more. 

I didn’t really take part in the last challenge for the Sisterhood but I figure that the site was a big part of the beginning of my weight loss journey and so as the site and myself celebrate a year of fitness and weight loss, Iwill join them for this next challenge.  I am on my way to the gym in a little bit here so I will do my first weigh-in tonight while I am there.  The home scale says 130lbs.  we’ll see what the doctor office style scale says. My guess?  133lbs. 

Will you be joining the Sisterhood?!

I mentioned before how I was having some health issues and I was going to go to the doctors for a checkup.  I finally went today.  I went to a new doctor because my former doctor just wasn’t cutting it the last time I went.  Which, sadly, was years ago. 

I told him all of my symptoms…being hot and sweating all the time, the headaches, the extreme fatigue, slight weight gain, etc.  It was funny because after listening to me, he asked me if my mom’s name was my mom’s name.  I said yes and he said I sounded so much like her with my symptoms.  He looked at my medical history paper and said he would not be surprised if I had the same thyroid problems that my mom has been having. 

I really like this doctor.  He really took the time to talk to me and listen to me.  He was kind and had a wonderful bedside manner that sometimes you just don’t find with doctors. 

The nurse who took my blood pressure was a bit surprised by my bottom number and said it seemed a little high but since this was my first time there, she wasn’t too concerned because she doesn’t have a history of my blood pressure readings.  Okay.  The doctor said that my glands were a little enlarged and so he wrote me prescriptions for bloodwork.  Also, I have to get an ultrasound of my thyroid. He ordered bloodwork to check my levels for my thyroid, diabetes, cholesterol and a few other things.  I will have to call tomorrow and schedule the ultrasound.  I can’t wait to find out the results.  It’s not that I am hoping to have to be on medication or anything but I am hoping for an answer for the way I have been feeling and I am hoping to feel better and more like myself again. 

It has been fun teasing the older ladies at work because of my “hot flashes”  I’ve been telling them that I was just going through menopause with the rest of them. 

Luckily, he said that he should get the test results 24 hours after the bloodwork is taken and then we will go from there.   If I don’t have a problem with any of those things we are testing for, I sure hope he has another plan! 

This doctor, when discussing my weight, even reminded me that I was measuring higher today because of my clothes and shoes.  He estimates my weight without all of that at around 130lbs.  I freaking love this doctor!!!

I am going to make good on my promise! 

Here are the ladies of Team Purple!

Melissa (who is from the Sisterhood!) aka Lissa

Tammi

Stesha

Mendie

Tami

I just met these ladies last week through emails and so far, it has been really nice to connect and talk with them.  Even since before the challenge officially started these ladies have been so supportive and positive.  I am so fortunate and proud to be on the same team as these ladies!

Team PURPLE is going to kick butt in the competition! 

(If I messed up your link, please let me know!)

I have been doing well….eating smaller portions again (why yes, I did slack on the smaller portion thing!) and have been working out a lot.  I was at the gym four days last week and I went today for a new class that was hard.  I was thinking of going again tonight but I am going twice tomorrow.  I am going to a morning class and then tomorrow night, Hip Hop!!! I can’t wait…I got more people I know to come!

Then I went to the weight machine room and starting doing some of those machines to try to gain some strength. 

I was a bit hesitant but I tried  a yoga class and I loved it!  Yay!  I finally took a class!  Next I tried a Pilates class and really enjoyed that.  Here I was branching out a bit and learning that I liked these classes a little more than doing just the machines by myself.  I took a Zumba class (which I highly recommend, it is soooo fun!), but the one class that I always wanted to try but was always afraid to was the spinning class. 

I moved on to other classes recently, like within the last two months….body sculpting, cardio hip hop, bootcamp, abs, yogilates and total body conditioning.  I liked all those classes and still do take a few of them…definitely not bootcamp though!!  Haha, that damn near killed me! 

On Fridays, there is a “happy hour cycling” class and my sister and I have vowed to take that class no matter how afraid we are!  We finally took the class yesterday and I can tell you that it is such a workout!  I now understand why people come out of that class soaked with sweat!  I was sweating and I was sort of taking it easy because the instructor said not to go full force for the first class.  She was great and really helped push us when it got tough.  My butt is a bit sore today from the seat but I’m not in horrible pain.  If anyone out there would like to take a spinning class but is afraid, do it!  You can do it!

I think that I am going to try to take at least one spinning/cycling class a week.  I am hoping that it helps to slim down my thighs…a big problem area for myself. 

Luckily for me, my husband says,” I am a hips and thighs kind of guy.”  He likes a girl with some meat on her bones not a stick thin girl!  Whew, good thing!  Haha…he always tells the skinny girls that they need to put some meat on their bones! 

I made it to the gym four days this past week and I feel good.  I am hoping to get to the gym four days a week every week.  By summer’s end, I will be feeling and looking good!  I hope to have good results for the PURPLE team!!

What a stupid thought!!  I didn’t even pull those videos out of my suitcase!!  haha!

I wasn’t too terribly concerned about my weight on vacation because I wasn’t eating any more than usual or anything too horribly unhealthy.  I wasn’t eating unhealthy portion sizes either.  I did a lot of sitting around though….but hey, it was vacation!

When I got home, I was feeling great.  I think that having a tan helps with the body image because as I have heard before, you look slimmer when you are tan.  It works for me!  Plus, the husband kept telling me how great I look and how much thinner I look in my new OBX clothing.  (on a side note: Chuck has been amazing to me, he has helped me find my self-esteem after it had been lost for years, he tells me how beautiful I am, etc. )

I went to the gym on Tuesday evening for the first time in over a week.  I was fully prepared to be sore the next day.  While I was there, I wanted to step on the scale to see just where my weight was.  I have always used the gym’s doctor style scale so that is what I base my weight on.  I walked down the steps to get on the scale but the room was full of young guys so I kept on walking.  I know I am a wimp!

I didn’t get to the gym until yesterday (Saturday) so I was going to weigh myself then.  Chuck and I worked out for a very short time…only 45 minutes and all we did was weights.  As we were walking out to leave, I went to the scale to hop on.  Of course that is when his friend from high school walks in, just as I am stepping on the scale! At that point, I didn’t really care, I needed to know my weight! Besides, he was distracted by my amazing peeling that is going on on my back, it’s really fabulous!

Holy moly, my weight has stayed the same since the week before we left for vacation?!?!  I didn’t gain any weight?!  In fact, I lost a few ounces?! 

I couldn’t be happier about that.  I have my new gym schedule (they add/change/rearrange classes every 8 weeks or so) and I have mapped out my weekly routine.  It could change if the daycare calls me to start working.  I am happy to say that the hip hop classes are back!!!  On Wednesday evenings, I will be getting my dance on!!  It starts this week so I’m excited. 

I am going to try to keep going to the gym at least 4 days a week.  It could get tough if I start my new job but I am determined to do well because I am going to participate in the next challenge with the Sisterhood. They are doing a Biggest Loser style challenge with teams of 3-4 people using the weight loss percentage.  That way, I will be accountable for what I do and my participation and hard work will help others.  Nothing like a challenge to get you moving and working harder!  I would love to lose about ten more pounds and then maintain that weight within a few pounds. 

I am finally at a healthy weight for my height…. 130lbs.  at 5’3″.  Oh my goodness, can’t believe I just put that on here!  I am proud of myself though for the hard work I put into the weight loss.  I felt great being able to wear a bikini on vacation.  There were no pictures taken of me in that bikini…that I know of so it’s okay.  It was all family and they love me regardless of what my body looks like so I was okay with it. 

I’m hoping to look even better by the end of summer.  Maybe by then, I will feel okay with posting a picture of myself in my bikini!

We are leaving in three days for vacation and I have so much to do.  I am doing a lot of the shopping today, without Lincoln in tow.  I have a lot to get but with the five lists in hand, I should be good to go!  Yes, I have several lists for this one shopping day!  Yay for lists

I wish I could say that I am just purely excited for this vacation.  I am excited but the excitement is being overshadowed by the extreme anxiety that I have been dealing with for the past two weeks.  I am just so sick of the anxiety.  I guess maybe I should have gone on my meds a month ago before it all started, maybe I should have foreseen the anxiety building up.  I didn’t though.  If you have anxiety issues, then you know the physical problems that it can cause.  I have them all and it is wearing me down.  I have been having anxiety attacks on top of anxiety attacks.  I have the nausea, the stomach cramping, the irritable bowels (sorry!), the headaches, etc.  It is really annoying and if I could shut it all off, I would…oh how I would love to do that!  I am looking forward to Sunday when we are on our way and I can relax knowing that we are taking our kids to see the ocean for the first time.  That I can relax in the pool or walk across the street to the ocean.  That I will be surrounded by family and having fun away from the stresses of home! 

Jada also has her dance recital this weekend which has only added to the stress levels.  We are pretty set for all of the recital stuff but it would have been nice if we didn’t have to worry about it before vacation and I could spend the two days preparing more. 

I am doing well otherwise.  I have been going to the gym and trying to take my mind off of the stress and burning some calories.  It has really helped me to sweat out the problems! 

I am going to try to post while on vacation…during some down time.  I hope you all have a wonderful few days until I post again….sorry for the rant post today!